Chapter 8: A Lizard Returns

He opens his eyes slowly to find the strange, off-color world he was riding through has become a deep, blood-red environ. he feels the weight of his body that now rests on his right shoulder and remembers,

“oh yeah, i was just sent flying out of a car at 80 mph".

he pushes himself up from the fetal position he wound up in and is surprised to feel no physical pain. psychologically on the other hand, he feels intensely oppressed. in any direction he looks, it feels like he is surrounded by an ever-changing rotation of disturbing and horrible imagery and recollections.

he hears a car door SLAM with an intensity that seemed deafening. he turns in the direction of the sound to find the other version of him (the one driving a car) walking away from a now pristine, upgraded model of the ‘02 galant with a deep orange paint job. this other version of him walks up and swings his leg back as if he is about to kick him, causing him to wince and jostle away.

”Hahahahah. you think that’s how i’d hurt you?! i know you’ve already figured out that physical pain doesn’t exist here.”

the clone drags from a cigarette that magically appeared, with a smile equal parts scowl.

pulling himself up from the ground, he stands. he tries to hold back the torment that is looking around to see all of his horrible thoughts come to life. with as much restraint as possible, he tries to level with the clone.

”this is cute, man. this is like some dumbass ‘ghost of Christmas past’ bullshit. it’s barely creative. is this really it?”

the clone drags from the cigarette again which has not reduced in length.

”…maybe".

at that moment, the whole world starts to shift. it changes color. gravity feels tweaked. the ground feels unstable. the air feels and tastes different.

within a few seconds, he feels as if he has been turned inside out, or all of the material of his existence had just changed itself into something else. he’s literally stuck in the ground and is being pulled further into it.

he doesn’t know what else to do. he feels helpless and delirious, so he allows himself to get sucked in…

he feels encased and suffocated and wonders if he’ll die…and right at the moment of that thought, he lifts his head up to realize he is now sitting gently on the ground in a new area.

he inhales through his nose and gets pulled back into intense memories of ithaca. grapeseed oil. burts bees.
the feelings that come with it are palpable. he really starts to believe she might actually be here - and that’s when he hears her voice from behind him.

”hey…how are you doing?”

he turns around to face the source of the voice, which is in the darkness. he says nothing, but keeps looking in the direction he heard the noise. the sound of tiny footsteps grow closer and closer…

and then, he suddenly gets shoved from his back so hard that his neck whips back. he reaches his hands forward to catch his fall, but realize the ground has disappeared once again and he is in free fall. in his fall, he sees that above him is his clone once again, with a crazy scowl.

he keeps falling, not knowing where he’ll land. in a sense, he hopes he’ll never hit the ground.